Saturday, December 4, 2010

it's all a blurrrrr......or a dream........

I am having great difficulty with the astonishing speed of passing time! Am I the ONLY ONE??????? Truly, I have not really got in the groove of writing 2010........thanks to the "back" button you don't know that I typed 1020!!!! Now that would be something!! I alternate between feeling pushed and shoved or panting to catch my breath as I race to "keep up". I'm beginning to think there really is no hope for the catching up part. So my shoulders droop and do I admit my defeat???? Is there no cure??? no hope??? I used to wonder what in the world Jacob was talking about (Jacob 7:26)....lives passing "away like as it were unto us a dream". But I think I'm beginning to understand what he meant........it wasn't that long ago that I got married! right? but there are all these people who are "mine" that I'm responsible for! ME!!!! a grandma?!?!?!?!??? yet I love these little ones as though they really were my own, so they must be, right? And didn't we have Christmas yesterday?? almost...........? some days it feels like it............and since my last post the days have whipped by like the light/telephone poles along the highway. Almost too fast to count, yet there they are for the counting...complete with the swoops in between them..........what a ride!!

We got home from Florida on 10 November--Wednesday. My friend and I do a little hour long quilt class "thing" (for want of a better word) every second Saturday. I had to hurry my preparation for that. Then it was time to get serious about the tree skirt for the "festival tree". (Some of my cousins and other extended family members did a tree for the "Festival of the Trees" in Salt Lake City for Primary Children's Medical Center.........we have ties...........). The whole saga of finding fabric etc. is another post...........went for over night to my mother's and sister's for Thanksgiving.......just returned yesterday from two days in Salt Lake for the state bee convention.................I just want to stay home and have nothing to do...........is that possible????? I can't find the house lights, so we have almost no Christmas decorations up and I'm really struggling with Christmas spirit. I found it yesterday in the distribution center on 17th South. I stood there with tears in my eyes when one of the men asked me if I was finding what I came for.............yes............and it was peace and love to calm my troubled heart. Maybe it's my fault that everything is a blur. If I slowed down maybe I could count the "poles". You think??? Maybe someday I will "wake up" and find that my life really was "like unto a dream" and I'll be home..............really home.................sounds wonderful, doesn't it?

In the mean time, I intend to enjoy the time I have here............even if it is not what I thought it would be like, I can enjoy it. Here's to enjoying mortality!!!!! Love you all. Thanks for listening to my ramble. Maybe I will get some "Florida pictures" on here one day.........maybe not...........at any rate, I'm determined not to stress about it..............

2 comments:

  1. Ok, I am going to get the tree pictures on my blog! I also am determined to enjoy mortality! I remember however the last time I saw Susan Frazier and as I left Bessie's house I thought how BLESSED she is to be able to go to the otherside with here family there. You have been on my mind alot these past couples of weeks with the length of your trial with your Suzanne. I can't even imagine it. My prayers are with you.

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  2. I didn't know there were state bee conventions. COOL. I'm so glad you found peace and love in the Distribution Center. Just remember that feeling.

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